The world sucks and I need some peace

Trigger warning: The video above is a bit much to take.

This is my third attempt at writing what needs to be said, so I can move on with what I want to accomplish in life. I wrote three drafts. I typed “fuck” a lot. What I’ve come to realize is I’m done. There will be no more reaching across the aisle. There will be no more trying to understand where you’re coming from. There will be no more engagement from me.

Growing up, the newspaper was always in my home. Each morning, I’d walk down my grandmother’s 50-foot driveway and grab the paper out of the mailbox. She read it first, of course, but she would occasionally stop and read and article to me. When I moved away, she’d clip articles out of the paper and mail them to me. She also cut out Calvin & Hobbs comics. I knew every couple of weeks, I’d have a letter from her with the comic and some news. She did this until the day she died.

At night, we watched Chuck and Sue for the local news, then Tom Brokaw for the national and international news. Gram never forced me to watch or told me what to read. She led by example.

Being informed has always been an important part of my life, but it must change now. I’m about to complete a 30-day personal challenge to stay offline as much as possible. Even though I know the algorithms are designed to keep me on a platform, it’s still difficult to walk away.

I could go on about how I’ve been trying to warn people since 2016 about this guy. No one wanted to listen. My editor at the time admitted Cheetolini was a deplorable human being. On election day, he told me he still voted for this jackass while holding his nose because, “I just can’t vote for her.” There was a conversation. I remember telling him he was a jackass. Actually, I think the term I used was “fucking jackass.”

I deleted my social media accounts in 2021 to try to get some perspective in my life. I lost touch with a lot of people, but my mental health improved. It continued to get better with a sane president because I wasn’t bombarded with 20 pieces of stupid fucking information daily.

Then, the cult leader got re-elected.

I’ve known who this mealy-mouthed wannabe dictator is my entire life. I’ve heard abusive shit fall from his McDonald’s stained lips my entire life. It’s just gotten worse over the years.

I suspect most people reading my screed already know this information, so let me speak to those of you who inexcusably voted for this pedophile three times.

You are part of the problem. You insist on only voting republican, regardless of who they are. I’m not going to point out that he’s a racist, adjudicated rapist, 36-time convicted felon, conman, and all-around example of what we teach children not to be and who we shouldn’t hang out with. I’m going to stick to one subject.

If you still support this pathetic excuse for a human, you support pedophilia. It’s likely that he trafficked women through his beauty pageants and through Mar-A-Largo. The evidence is there. You just refuse to look at it Don’t speak to me about how “she was 14.” Fuck you.

The words he spews are reminiscent of abusers. Every day you support this pedophile, you are telling me that what happened to me was okay, too. For that, you are a despicable piece of shit. I’m not going to try to understand your point of view anymore or think you’re misguided. You’re as much a piece of shit as he is.

I’m not going to explain why what he did was wrong. You fucking know it was wrong. To continue to defend him means that you continue to condemn and blame me and all the girls he raped for what happened to us.

Even if you have never been abused, knowing who this man is should be enough to never want any association with him. His behavior was well-known in 2015. There was no excuse to be uninformed about this repugnant piece of human skin then and there is no excuse now.

Quite simply, if you still support any republican in Washington, D.C., fuck you. They will come for you after they come for me. I view you as a tree in the forest who is cheering for the axe because the handle is made of wood and you think it’s one of your own.

My grandmother taught me to be informed about the world, but she died in 2011 and never had a computer or cell phone. I recently realized it was my fear of disappointing her that has kept me tied to reading so much news.

So, over the past 30 days, I tried to step away from most of the places I read the news because it is not a health place to be anymore. Around week three, I sat and thought, made a list, then thought some more. I will still try to be involved in things like protesting, but I can’t do the news. Human beings were not meant to consume so much information. It’s detrimental and I will no longer participate in my own destruction.

I made the decision that I will read one news site via my RSS feed and be picky about what I click on. I will also read Formula 1 news, Ars Technica, and listen to my podcast subscriptions (The History of English, The Thinking Atheist). Finally, I will continue to read Wil Wheaton’s blog and the two friends on Substack I follow. Everything else has to go.

Even now, I hesitate to write any of this because I am honestly trying to be a better person, but, fucking hell, you motherfuckers don’t want help. You want to see me and people I care about to suffer. I can’t abide by that and refuse to associate with people like you.

Maybe a better person than me can reach you. I just know it won’t be me. Have the day you voted for. Don’t call me when the shit rains down on you.