{"id":1972,"date":"2019-07-24T10:05:08","date_gmt":"2019-07-24T16:05:08","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.irenenorth.com\/writings\/?p=1972"},"modified":"2024-04-22T02:46:11","modified_gmt":"2024-04-22T02:46:11","slug":"the-chaos-inside","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/irenenorth.com\/writings\/2019\/07\/24\/the-chaos-inside\/","title":{"rendered":"The chaos inside"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><a href=\"https:\/\/www.irenenorth.com\/writings\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/07\/clear-clear-water-close-up-33682-cropped.jpg\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/www.irenenorth.com\/writings\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/07\/clear-clear-water-close-up-33682-cropped-1024x683.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"629\" height=\"420\" class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-1973\" \/><\/a><!--more--><\/p>\n<p><strong>The chaos inside<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>I keep the lights on<br \/>\nbecause I&#8217;m afraid of the shadows<\/p>\n<p>today I&#8217;m far away<br \/>\nfrom being fine<\/p>\n<p>the toll on my soul surges<br \/>\nI&#8217;m starting to be pulled down again<\/p>\n<p>I&#8217;m drowning in a tidal wave of words<br \/>\nwashing over my mind<br \/>\nand the flashbacks return<\/p>\n<p>Some days<br \/>\nI don&#8217;t know who the hell I am<br \/>\nor who I&#8217;m supposed to become<br \/>\nSome days<br \/>\nI don&#8217;t give a fuck<br \/>\nSome days<br \/>\nI don&#8217;t feel good enough<\/p>\n<p>The chaos inside<br \/>\nwho am I<br \/>\nwho should I be<\/p>\n<p>I choke on the memories<br \/>\nthey return with a thunderous crush<br \/>\nthat takes my breath away<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[9],"tags":[285,294,377],"class_list":["post-1972","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-poetry","tag-poetry","tag-ptsd","tag-trauma"],"post_mailing_queue_ids":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/irenenorth.com\/writings\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1972","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/irenenorth.com\/writings\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/irenenorth.com\/writings\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/irenenorth.com\/writings\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/irenenorth.com\/writings\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1972"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/irenenorth.com\/writings\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1972\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":3746,"href":"https:\/\/irenenorth.com\/writings\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1972\/revisions\/3746"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/irenenorth.com\/writings\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1972"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/irenenorth.com\/writings\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1972"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/irenenorth.com\/writings\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1972"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}